I have a close friend who has gone through so much in her life that I can't even fathom. Not only does she have her own health issues to deal with, but her young son has numerous serious conditions that constantly have to be tended as well. I won't go deep into detail, but in just the past week she has spent nearly every day going back and forth to different hospitals and ER's with her son. What was supposed to be a fairly simple outpatient procedure turned into not one, but two surgeries and a two day stay in the hospital. There have been what seems like constant complications and dr. visits since. And she's doing all this while ignoring dr.'s orders to stay off of her feet because of a health issue that she herself is having.
All of this is just the tip of the iceberg for her. She will probably spend years going to therapy sessions, dr.'s visits, and procedures for her son. Not to mention all of her own appointments. She can't leave her son with just any babysitter and "get away" or have "mommy time" or "girl's night" or "alone time" or even a date with her husband. With her son's specific health needs he has to have somebody she can fully trust to watch him. Someone who's "medically minded" as she puts it. Someone she can rely on to watch for problems and give him the right meds in the right amounts at the right time. Someone who can properly use and care for his feeding tube. And the list goes on and on. So, basically, she can only get a break if her parents or her in-laws can watch him.
Something that baffles me is that she thinks that I have it worse off. Sure, I have a few health conditions, including a pretty severe immune deficiency that can occasionally cause serious problems. And my 2 year old son has also been diagnosed with the same deficiency. So, I probably can empathize with her a lot more than most (or maybe any) of her other friends, but we definitely don't have it as hard as they do. We may occasionally get pretty sick and need more serious medical intervention. But as long as we stay on top of it, live healthily, and keep up with our meds/treatments it shouldn't ever be life-threatening or cause any major, lasting complications. But all of this is, in my eyes, nothing compared to what she faces.
She is a superwoman in my eyes. Not only does she face all of this head-on, but she does it with grace. You will never see her complain about any of it on Facebook. In fact, besides occasionally asking for prayer, she never even mentions their problems there at all. I even have to convince her that it's okay for her to "complain" to me about it. I know she needs to talk about it sometimes and not keep all that burden to herself, but she doesn't want to have a "poor me" attitude. And through all of this, she never loses her faith in God and her belief that He is in control. She's amazing.
We should all strive to be more like this. Let's not focus on the bad in our lives. Let's not ignore the good just so we can complain about the bad and get some sympathy. I never understood what my mom meant when I was little, but she was right: Attitude is a choice. You can CHOOSE to focus on the bad and let it bring you down and make you depressed and grouchy, or you can CHOOSE to look past the bad and see the good in your life and be happy. Always be aware that there are many people who have it much worse off than you do. Are you and your family fairly healthy? Do you have a roof over your head and food in your stomach? Do you have clothes to wear? Yes? Then you are BLESSED. Next time you're tempted to complain or whine online about something bad in your life, why don't you stop and use that time to thank God for the good in your life instead? And maybe think about someone who has it worse off than you and pray for them, too?
